I had a powerful experience yesterday. A patient named Betty (named changed to protect her anonymity) called. She was not feeling well and she said her blood pressure was 186/130. She does have high blood pressure for which she takes medicine but it is usually perfectly controlled unless she gets upset.
I went to see her at her home and her blood pressure was as she had stated. She was otherwise OK but without energy or her usual pep.
We talked about what she had been thinking about before she began feeling poorly. She related she was visiting with her granddaughter who related to her that she was in love with a man from Africa who was Muslim. This made Betty feel concerned as she had the perception that Muslims were not good to their wives. She was concerned because her husband was not good to her and actually was quite abusive to her and her kids. She really did not have any prejudice against Muslims but this started her down a "dark road" of bad memories and regrets of many aspects of her life.
She was really NOT aware that she was thinking any of these thoughts but did recall them as we talked and shared all of her flow of negative thoughts with me. She was sad and tearful and felt ashamed of her life and her past. However, after she finished relating her flow of thoughts, she was peaceful. She felt better. She remembered all the beauty and love she had in her life. Her blood pressure was now 130/80. Her usual "spunkiness" was back.
This dramatic example is not rare. The "dark road" of thoughts can take even the happiest and strongest of folks down. The lesson: sharing our pain sets us free; holding in our pain and stuffing it into our unconscious stores is NOT a free lunch.
Community, connection and communication are the real healers. How do we get this message out? How do we spread the truly great news? We can be well and we can be free. We just have to be open to sharing our vulnerable, tender places. Not so terrible.
I went to see her at her home and her blood pressure was as she had stated. She was otherwise OK but without energy or her usual pep.
We talked about what she had been thinking about before she began feeling poorly. She related she was visiting with her granddaughter who related to her that she was in love with a man from Africa who was Muslim. This made Betty feel concerned as she had the perception that Muslims were not good to their wives. She was concerned because her husband was not good to her and actually was quite abusive to her and her kids. She really did not have any prejudice against Muslims but this started her down a "dark road" of bad memories and regrets of many aspects of her life.
She was really NOT aware that she was thinking any of these thoughts but did recall them as we talked and shared all of her flow of negative thoughts with me. She was sad and tearful and felt ashamed of her life and her past. However, after she finished relating her flow of thoughts, she was peaceful. She felt better. She remembered all the beauty and love she had in her life. Her blood pressure was now 130/80. Her usual "spunkiness" was back.
This dramatic example is not rare. The "dark road" of thoughts can take even the happiest and strongest of folks down. The lesson: sharing our pain sets us free; holding in our pain and stuffing it into our unconscious stores is NOT a free lunch.
Community, connection and communication are the real healers. How do we get this message out? How do we spread the truly great news? We can be well and we can be free. We just have to be open to sharing our vulnerable, tender places. Not so terrible.
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